you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize