i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
