You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
