This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
