you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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