Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
