I hate all girls vehemently.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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