I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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