Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
