he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
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