I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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