When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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