Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
