Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
dude i'm inner monologue high
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
