everyone is single if you try hard enough
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
