have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
