Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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