I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Randomize
