hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
