Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
