Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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