Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
