Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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