When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
