somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
