its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
