Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
