She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
