No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
