It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
