so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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