Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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