It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize