I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
