oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize