I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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