When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
My vagina just clenched in fear
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize