is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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