dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i think im in europe. pls send help
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
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