Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(850): View more from Florida

Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?

(850): View more from Florida

I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife

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(210): View more from Texas

this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.

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(703): View more from Virginia

Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.

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(801): View more from Utah

I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses

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(574): View more from Indiana

Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas

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(507): View more from Minnesota

He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.

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(253): View more from Washington

I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.

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