I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize