He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
