The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
