Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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