You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
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