you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
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