Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
