Jerry, you need to find god
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize