u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
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