I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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